The Golden Rules of Networking
How to connect with, communicate with, and support your network to foster strong relationships and build your career and theirs
by Lisa Frank
Networking is indeed, an art, filled with many do’s and don’ts, should’ves and could’ves. With so much emphasis today on building profiles and perusing social networks, people are more accessible, boundaries have been blurred, and there are varying standards about what is considered appropriate, acceptable, and effective.
However, beneath it all, there are still social mores and rules of etiquette that hold true in order for the networking process to do what it’s supposed to do: to allow us to connect, interact and ultimately help each other in a genuine, thoughtful, and reciprocal manner.
Don’t Be Shy Get out there and meet people, face-to-face. Make it a goal to meet five new people the next time you go to a charity event, birthday party, trade show, conference, or networking social hour. Learn about them—what they do, where they are from, their families and interests. Exchange contact information. Don’t let their business cards collect dust on your desk. Follow up. Check in. Have dinner. Play golf. These people could become your new friends or future colleagues. But, you’ll never meet them if you don’t get out of the house.
Request, Don’t Expect It’s true—you never know until you ask. But, your wish may not always be granted. When you are asking someone to do you a favor, know your audience—figuratively and literally. Don’t be pushy or demanding. Offer something in return. Don’t get angry if they can’t/won’t help you. Be appreciative of any effort, big or small, regardless of the outcome. Keep the door open. Give them a reason to want to help you in the future.
We are people, not just profiles Even with pictures included, it can be easy to forget that those are people behind those profiles you’re reading. But, if you want to make a genuine and valuable connection, get out from behind the computer screen and make real time for them. Invite them for a cup of coffee or a drink. Or, if you can’t meet them in person, set a time to Skype/FaceTime, or have a phone call, at the very least. You never know what else you might have in common, or how you might be able to help each other now or in the future. I promise, you’ll be pleasantly surprised at what you learn from a live conversation.
It’s not just about YOU Give more than you take. Don’t keep score. Say yes to helping others.
Pay it Forward Reciprocate. It’s easy to just reach out to people when you need something, but the most successful networkers have a natural willingness to help others—even if there is nothing in it for them. Be generous. Make introductions. Think beyond yourself. What goes around, comes around.
Stay in touch Remember when your contact introduced you to his former boss about that job you wanted? Did you ever follow-up to let him know the outcome? How about that former classmate job-seeker you recommended to a recruiter for a search? Did you ever find out what happened? When people help you, don’t just leave ‘em hanging. Keep them in the loop. Show appreciation for their efforts. And, even if there isn’t a particular reason, keep up on what is going on with your network. Send a birthday greeting. Or a congratulatory email about a promotion. Or a just note to say hi if it’s been a long time since you talked last. It’s okay to reach out “just because.” People who are thinking of you like to know that you are thinking of them, too.
As you set new goals and career objectives, remember the Golden Rules. Reconnect with old friends or colleagues, meet and connect with new people, and take the opportunity to help someone else reach his/her goals this year. Networking is key to professional development and career advancement. Face it—we are all in this together. We need each other.
Frankly speaking: It’s not just what you know OR who know you…but it’s how you connect with who you know that gets you to where you want to be.
Lisa is the CEO of LBF Strategies, an independent executive recruitment and coaching firm, founded in 2012. Learn more about her firm at lbfstrategies.com